concert

took analyn to a concert today... i really want someone to make a stand up routine about metal heads with sented herbal essences conditioner or some shit.

ps. guacamole is fucking delicious.

alright fuck it. Doom tree was super dope. annnd i missed yesterday. But whatever. I'm on it today

i downloaded a linux based fruityloops/logic/etc clone. I'm gonnna at least try to write a little bit again.... pretty much that was the whole purpose of this thing anyway... so here goes.
I figure this is as good a place as any, so i can someday see this shit somewhere else cause some asshat bit it off the internet.

We're going down-- like rats in a drain pipe- like i'm using the same mic used to announce MMA fights, like i spit such insane spite i've got my lip bruised by the mic's right... right? right mike?
we're going down. Like... it's sink or swim. and i'm all in, and i'm drawin dead again...

****

I've seen hip hop shows reduced to a poetry slam, shit was live like the slam was part of the bands plan...

****

and something about-- there's no money in that, so i flip up my hat while i spit hipster rap.


****

I write one line at a time... it's a slow and laborous way to make poems... or anything else.

The plan is to write s omething every day. Then publish it... no editing that's not done on the fly... if i fall asleep before i'm done, i publish it, no editing again of course, Hopefully if i do this enough i'll start writing things that are at least worth reading a little =P but i make no promises.

There's something i can't explain about salt lake nights in the summer.

Recently my sleep schedule's completely flipped. Not subtly like when it slipped from a midnight to 3am bedtime...but by the time i'm trying to sleep, buisness people are past driving to work and have settled on where todays grind will take them for lunch.

i haven't started trying to find my bed until the south end of 7am for the last few nights. I've never repeatedly slept until 3 in the afternoon before, but this year i've started watching the sun go down and come back up religiously.

It's like the city sings in the night time... It's the same sense of solitude that i used to find snowboarding by myself in highschool... nothing but the sounds of the snow crunching and the wisk of trees... except salt lake has a pulse in the night... it's just the same reclusive pulse i feel like i adapt when my life feels like i've slowed to a low. there's a level of depression that works for me. when the delicate PH of antisocial hater and loner on the verge of total rejection has bubbled enough that the ultimate end of the road becomes a stir crazy mess. I

A fresh start

12 days of christmas update....

Okay... so it's officially the 2nd day of christmas and so far things are going well... M.D. (names shortened to protect identities) is (i belive, i would be happy to be proven wrong) has claimed the title of Supreeme Saviorinator with a score of 5 liberated jesuses!! But today we've run into a problem... or at least I have... While we were going to make snowmen in the park, i worked (i know...) until 7 and now the snow's to cold to stick together... i may have to wake up early tomorrow and build my snowman before i go to work... luckily most of next week i have off (short 2 hours a day) so much winter mischief will ensue. Stay tuned, I expect to have the rest of the blog finished in the next 24 hours for sure.

-LC

The 12 Days of Christmas

I fuckin hate Christmas. It's time to take December back.

Bring the ruckus.

Step One
for my subversive Christmas.

Baby Jesus Liberation Army

Jesus HATES dept. stores, boutiques, Hallmark, Malls... etc. It's time to free him from his oppressors. (Now mind you... me and Jesus aren't on the best of terms.. but We believe repression in all forms to be evil... and Jesus isn't gonna fight back for himself!) The demonstration is over at midnight the first night (14th of December), and whomever liberates the most baby Jesus figurines (and therefore renders nativity scenes around the nation unsellable...) becomes SUPREME SAVIORINATOR and is officially given first pick of any holiday vegan goodies until christmas!!

(oh, and of course.. no monetary reimbursement allowed... we would hate to further fund his oppressors)

Step Two
and Winter Anarchy for everyone =)

Obscene Snowman Building Contest

Now we wouldn't want to create an entire campaign against that one certain holiday... it's the consumerism and mindlessness of the season that generates the loathing! (that and christmas songs. IN OCTOBER. fuck that.) So how about some good old fashioned fun that's gonna cost us nothing, and create all sorts of entertainment for everyone!!! How about an Obscene Snowman Building Contest (OSBC from here on out)!! Everyone gets together... hopefully at a park, or a house on the corner of the busiest intersection in the city (bonus points if it's not your house) And builds Snowmen!!! and not just your regular snowman... but the, "MOMMY? WHY ARE THOSE GIRL SNOWMEN WRESTLING!??" kinda snowmen!! okay... so actually we were hoping for something a little less lude and more along the lines of you know, your favorite bloody bible scene... (keeping with the christian spirit of the hollidays... of course) Or anything else you can come up with!! Send me pictures!!! (arghrapture@gmail.com)

Step Three
A little direction

Okay... Funs over... down to some serious reclamation... or at least, some serious chaos for anyone stupid enough to be working big box retail this time of year... (no offense Krys) Granted... their lives are hell already, but if they're smart, they're gonna be disgruntled and all about our little plan... otherwise... fuck em.

What you need.
Paper (unless you can get your hands on stickers... that'd be rad.)
Ways to make the paper pretty (and convincing... you wanna fool everyone and look official)
Wheat Paste, or some rediculously good tape.
An evil corperate conglomerate of your choice... say... Toys'R'us!

Directions...
1. Take paper. Take markers/ways to make it look pretty...
2. Use markers to make paper say something along the lines of '50% off EVERYTHING WITH A BARCODE!!!' or 'Entire STORE, buy one get one free!!'
3. Wheatpaste to front door of store! (GO FAST... LOOK OFFICIAL... DON'T GET CAUGHT)
4. Flee... or videotape the poor frustrated store managers.

Obviously... any variation on this idea is good... if you can pilfer the 50% off stickers from behind the counter... most stores have a policy that they have to honor the marked price if it's lower then the original price... otherwise it's false advertising!!! ENJOY!!!

STEP FOUR
Some holiday spirit after all

Okay, don't get me all wrong. Christmas isn't totally evil. Sure... Christianity is right up there with capitalism, but some of the stuff's not so bad... unity... importance of real people in your life... a spirit of benevolance to others... these seem like good ideas. So, the next celebration on our agenda is a little more uplifting. Right now, we're working on the hand out... but in the mean time... a little video you've probably seen alread.
Free Hugs
So, the plan's as follows... Follow their lead... take the sign (also offer the option of a joke for the more uncomfortable if you'd like) and go to a nice crowded place. But we're adding the pamphlet on 'how to enjoy the hollidays for free' as soon as we get it finished.

STEP FIVE
hope you're not against getting chased off the property..

For our next adventure... we're gonna need two teams. And we're gonna need a little help from the weather.

We're planning on staging, the BIGGEST, most intrusive, most PUBLIC snowball fight that this city has EVER SEEN. Pick the biggest outdoor mall... or public gathering... or christmas bullshit event you can find. put half your participants on one half of the 'arena' the other half on the other. Get yourselves weapons. By weapons i mean snowballs. DECIMATE the other team with the snowballs... Try not to hit bystanders (but don't try THAT hard) See how long before you get kicked out.

NOTE... having official team uniforms makes snowball fights SO much funnier... even if the uniform is a holiday color'd bandannas worn black bloq style to make sure the passerbys know something fishy's going down, right before they accidentally get pegged in the ass by a slushball!!!